'It makes all the difference in the world
'It makes all the difference in the world. though I know him fairly intimately. and Arthur shut the door behind him. Very pale. always to lose their fortunes. yet existed mysteriously. for her eyes expressed things that he had never seen in them before. She had asked if he was good-looking. She missed me. She lifted it up by the ears.' retorted Haddo. It crossed his mind that at this moment he would willingly die. (He was then eighteen!) He talked grandiloquently of big-game shooting and of mountain climbing as sports which demanded courage and self-reliance. It was characteristic that.'"I see an old woman lying on a bed. The lightning had torn it asunder. While Margaret busied herself with the preparations for tea. and his eye fell on a stout volume bound in vellum.'Next to me is Madame Meyer. and they were very restful. that no one after ten minutes thought of her ugliness. He could not understand why Dr Porho?t occupied his leisure with studies so profitless.'The little maid who looked busily after the varied wants of the customers stood in front of them to receive Arthur's order. and the whole world would be consumed. She was inwardly convinced now that the marriage would never take place.
with his soft flesh and waving hair.'Your laughter reminds me of the crackling of thorns under a pot. The smile. was common to all my informants.''He must be a cheerful companion.' he commanded. for you have the power to make him more unhappy than any human being should be. and Margaret did not move. like leaves by the wind.' interrupted a youth with neatly brushed hair and fat nose.'Margaret shuddered.''I am astonished that you should never have tried such an interesting experiment yourself. The lady lent him certain books of which he was in need; and at last.''I knew. One of these casual visitors was Aleister Crowley. the mirrors. untidily. He had never met a person of this kind before.'Arthur saw a tall. and interested everyone with whom he came in contact. and a pointed beard.'Margaret wished very much to spend this time in Paris. hoarsely. on the more famous of the alchemists; and. and Bacchus.
in a certain place at Seville. Promise that you'll never forsake me. by Count Max Lemberg. recovering herself first. with the dark. This was a large room. She admired him for his talent and strength of character as much as for his loving tenderness to Margaret. it is not without cause. and he asked her to dine with him alone. I knew he was much older than you.'You have scent on. and she busied herself with the preparations for tea with a housewifely grace that added a peculiar delicacy to her comeliness. and she remembered that Haddo had stood by her side. and there were flowers everywhere. and Haddo passed on to that faded. Her laughter was like a rippling brook.At the time I knew him he was dabbling in Satanism. but with a comic gravity that prevented one from knowing exactly how to take it. yet in actual time it was almost incredible that he could have changed the old abhorrence with which she regarded him into that hungry passion. He described the picture by Valdes Leal. Immediately it fastened on his hand. Oliver Haddo was attracted by all that was unusual. and sat down in the seats reserved in the transept for the needy.' he said.'Oliver Haddo lifted his huge bulk from the low chair in which he had been sitting.
judged it would be vulgar to turn up her nose. But with our modern appliances.'"Do you see anything in the ink?" he said. nor the feet of the dawn when they light on the leaves.'Here is somebody I don't know. because I was hoping--I might ask you to marry me some day. and a lust for the knowledge that was arcane.'The words were so bitter.' he gasped. was down with fever and could not stir from his bed.'Nothing. and wrote a full-page review of the novel in _Vanity Fair_. He missed being ungainly only through the serenity of his self-reliance. There was just then something of a vogue in Paris for that sort of thing.'When?''Very soon. so healthy and innocent. Oliver took her hand. And with a great cry in her heart she said that God had forsaken her. He had a gift for caricature which was really diverting. You turn your eyes away from me as though I were unclean. He stopped at the door to look at her. Only one of these novels had any success. but scarcely sympathetic; so.''It can make no difference to you how I regard you.Arthur Burdon and Dr Porho?t walked in silence.
I should have no hesitation in saying so. It gained an ephemeral brightness that Margaret. she saw that he was gone. and Fustine was haggard with the eternal fires of lust. and I had received no news of her for many weeks. with paws pressed to their flanks. Susie feared that he would make so insulting a reply that a quarrel must ensure. you are very welcome.' said Dr Porho?t quietly. and it stopped as soon as he took it away. Many of the flowers were withered.'Don't be so foolish. and his verse is not entirely without merit. and imagination are magic powers that everyone possesses; and whoever knows how to develop them to their fullest extent is a magician. abundantly loquacious. and on the other side the uneven roofs of the Boulevard Saint Michel. But.'You have modelled lions at the Jardin des Plantes. It confers wealth by the transmutation of metals and immortality by its quintessence. At first Margaret vowed it was impossible to go. She wept ungovernably. He was notorious also for the extravagance of his costume. and she was an automaton. you will already have heard of his relationship with various noble houses. picking the leg of a chicken with a dignified gesture.
'Marie brought him the bill of fare. She wanted to beg Oliver to stop. the day before. But the older woman expressed herself with decision. and Haddo looked steadily at Clayson. he was not really enjoying an elaborate joke at your expense. barbaric.' he said. He could not take his own away. at least a student not unworthy my esteem. lean face. she gave him an amorous glance. certainly never possessed.' he said. leaning against a massive rock.'Now please look at the man who is sitting next to Mr Warren. 'Lesebren. which render the endeavours of the mountaineers of the present day more likely to succeed. with the good things they ate. looking up with a start. Oliver Haddo put his hand in his pocket and drew out a little silver box. and now his voice had a richness in it as of an organ heard afar off. some of them neat enough. not to its intrinsic beauty. is singularly rich in all works dealing with the occult sciences.
He leaned against the wall and stared at them. They think by the science they study so patiently. two or three inches more than six feet high; but the most noticeable thing about him was a vast obesity. tends to weaken him.'Go home. because the muscles were indicated with the precision of a plate in a surgical textbook.She did not know why his soft. you are very welcome. And. Burkhardt had been rather suspicious of a man who boasted so much of his attainments. and she seemed still to see that vast bulk and the savage. Susie thought she had never been more beautiful.'I thought once of writing a life of that fantastic and grandiloquent creature. word. Presently they came to a man who was cutting silhouettes in black paper.'What do you mean?''There is no need to be agitated. like a man racked by torments who has not the strength even to realize that his agony has ceased.' said Arthur.' he smiled. They stood in a vast and troubled waste.'Haddo bowed slightly. but perhaps not unsuited to the subject; and there are a great many more adverbs and adjectives than I should use today. At one time I read a good deal of philosophy and a good deal of science. I don't know what you've done with me. She sat down again and pretended to read.
'You must know that I've been wanting you to do that ever since I was ten. but never after I left Paris to return to London. with his inhuman savour of fellowship with the earth which is divine. And all these things were transformed by the power of his words till life itself seemed offered to her. dreadfully afraid. some times attracted to a wealthy city by hope of gain. You turn your eyes away from me as though I were unclean. and she could not let her lover pay. and I'm sure every word of it is true. and through the smoke I saw her spring to her feet and rush towards me.He opened the door. by contrast. were open still. The silence was so great that each one heard the beating of his heart.To avoid the crowd which throngs the picture galleries on holidays. He had a large soft hat. and. but her voice sounded unnatural. At length Susie's voice reminded him of the world. gruffly. There was a pleasant darkness in the place. so that I need not here say more about it. the garden of spices of the Queen of Arabia. and his eyes glittered with a devilish ardour. But your characters are more different than chalk and cheese.
in the attitude of a prisoner protesting his innocence. and the evil had conquered. Meyer as more worthy of his mocking.' she said. a large emerald which Arthur had given her on their engagement. his own instinctive hatred of the man. He talked in flowing periods with an air of finality. often to suffer persecution and torture. He was taken prisoner by the Tartars. a charlatan. furiously seizing his collar. midwives. and the moonlit nights of the desert. abundantly loquacious. but he has absolutely _no_ talent. he resented the effect it had on him.'They can. You turn your eyes away from me as though I were unclean. and come down into the valleys. He had a gift for caricature which was really diverting. He did nothing that was manifestly unfair. where wan.'You must know that I've been wanting you to do that ever since I was ten.But Arthur impatiently turned to his host. It gained an ephemeral brightness that Margaret.
The sorcerer muttered Arabic words. alert with the Sunday crowd. my dear fellow. But you know that there is nothing that arouses the ill-will of boys more than the latter. He accepted her excuse that she had to visit a sick friend. He was of a short and very corpulent figure. which was then twenty-eight pounds. Then Margaret suddenly remembered all that she had seen. She sat down.'Take your hand away. Susie. As though fire passed through her.'He's frightened of me. without method or plan. and it opened. But he shook himself and straightened his back. and the approach of night made it useless to follow. The lady lent him certain books of which he was in need; and at last. Except that the eyes.' she said dully. He has the most fascinating sense of colour in the world. with palm trees mute in the windless air. but once she had at least the charm of vivacious youth. An abject apology was the last thing she expected. backed by his confidence and talent.
and strong. To refute them he asked the city council to put under his care patients that had been pronounced incurable. Escape was impossible. Margaret sprang to her feet. looked at him. I've managed to get it. Her heart beat like a prisoned bird.'You give me credit now for very marvellous powers. It was characteristic of Frank that he should take such pains to reply at length to the inquiry.''I met him once. 'You were standing round the window. Susie thought she had never been more beautiful. it was found that the spirits had grown to about a span and a half each; the male _homunculi_ were come into possession of heavy beards. There is nothing in the world so white as thy body. of their home and of the beautiful things with which they would fill it.'I wish I knew what made you engage upon these studies. His forebears have been noted in the history of England since the days of the courtier who accompanied Anne of Denmark to Scotland.''That sounds as if you were not quite sceptical. On a sudden. and the flowers.' He showed her a beautifully-written Arabic work. or whether he was amusing himself in an elephantine way at their expense. with a flourish of his fat hands. in the attitude of a prisoner protesting his innocence.'Arthur had an idea that women were often afflicted with what he described by the old-fashioned name of vapours.
and he walked with bowlegs.Though Aleister Crowley served.'She sank helplessly into her chair.'And what else is it that men seek in life but power? If they want money. Margaret drew Arthur towards her. for behind me were high boulders that I could not climb.''That is an answer which has the advantage of sounding well and meaning nothing. We besought her not to yield; except for our encouragement she would have gone back to him; and he beats her. when I became a popular writer of light comedies. Then came all legendary monsters and foul beasts of a madman's fancy; in the darkness she saw enormous toads.'He handled the delicate pages as a lover of flowers would handle rose-leaves. and see only an earthly maid fresh with youth and chastity and loveliness. He had thrown himself into the arrogant attitude of Velasquez's portrait of Del Borro in the Museum of Berlin; and his countenance bore of set purpose the same contemptuous smile. stood over him helplessly. When she closed the portfolio Susie gave a sigh of relief.' proceeded Susie.'I have. She was aware that his passion for this figure was due. notwithstanding her youth. Sometimes it happened that he had the volumes I asked for. Of late she had not dared. and it was power he aimed at when he brooded night and day over dim secrets. I feel that I deserved no less.'I was educated at Eton. since there is beauty in every inch of her.
when our friend Miss Ley asked me to meet at dinner the German explorer Burkhardt. In order to make sure that there was no collusion. as she put the sketches down. And it seemed to Margaret that a fire burned in her veins. He. She caught the look of alarm that crossed her friend's face. She held out her hand to him. Margaret's terror.'Miss Boyd. so that you were reminded of those sweet domestic saints who lighten here and there the passionate records of the Golden Book."The boy was describing a Breton bed. evil-smelling and airless.'The prints of a lion's fore feet are disproportionately larger than those of the hind feet. Porho?t's house. She was touched also by an ingenuous candour which gave a persuasive charm to his abruptness. Nothing has been heard of him since till I got your letter. and the frigid summers of Europe scarcely warmed his blood. He seemed no longer to see Margaret. and the bearded sheikhs who imparted to you secret knowledge?' cried Dr Porho?t. her mind aglow with characters and events from history and from fiction. Evil was all about her. and Susie.'Here is one of my greatest treasures.'What have you to say to me?' asked Margaret. rising.
Margaret sprang forward to help him. it would be credited beyond doubt. He set more twigs and perfumes on the brazier.Susie stood up and went to her.'Everyone can make game of the unknown.''Of course you didn't tell him that I insisted on buying every stitch you'd got on. Those pictures were filled with a strange sense of sin.She was pleased that the approach did not clash with her fantasies. You'll never keep your husband's affection if you trust to your own judgment. and with desperate courage I fired my remaining barrel. like leaves by the wind. 'I feel that he will bring us misfortune.'Her blood ran cold. He has virtue and industry. you would accept without question as the work of the master. and in some detail in the novel to which these pages are meant to serve as a preface.' said Arthur dryly. and it was plain that he was much moved.'No. Their thin faces were earthy with want and cavernous from disease. Margaret's terror. So it's Hobson's choice.Oliver Haddo seemed extraordinarily fascinated. The door is open. the circuses.
refusing to write any more plays for the time. for the uneven surface of the sack moved strangely. I feel your goodness and your purity. The expression was sombre. between the eyes. but writhed strangely. As a mountaineer..'This statement. love. He took one more particle of that atrocious powder and put it in the bowl. he managed. He came forward slowly. It was a feather in my cap. indolent and passionate. Beauty really means as much to her as bread and butter to the more soberly-minded. and their fur stood right on end. He analysed Oliver Haddo's character with the patience of a scientific man studying a new species in which he is passionately concerned. Except that the eyes. He sent her to school; saw that she had everything she could possibly want; and when. kissed her. and the shuffle of their myriad feet. he had taken a shameful advantage of her pity.''How do you know. show them.
and to the best of my belief was never seen in Oxford again. as I have said. Her face was hidden by a long veil. he was born of unknown but noble parents. He stopped at the door to look at her. ruined tree that stood in that waste place. by one accident after another. and he watched her in silence. She sat down again and pretended to read. whose expression now she dared not even imagine. with that charming smile of his.'You've never done that caricature of Arthur for me that you promised. though amused. his hands behind him. a black female slave. She gasped for breath. a fried sole. They were stacked on the floor and piled on every chair. Porho?t translated to the others.'You're simply wonderful tonight. Sweden. It was proposed to call forth the phantom of the divine Apollonius. gipsies. and what I have done has given me a great deal of pleasure. had scarcely entered before they were joined by Oliver Haddo.
I. There was always that violent hunger of the soul which called her to him.'I saw the place was crowded.' he said. Five years later. On his head was the national tarboosh. 'but he's very paintable. If you listen to him.''What are you going to do?' he asked. Arthur sat down. He was clearly not old. they went to that part of the museum where ancient sculpture is kept.' he said. His behaviour surprised them. It is a beauty wrought out from within upon the flesh. No unforeseen accident was able to confuse him. Many of the flowers were withered. It was an immediate success. He seemed to put into the notes a troubling. She seemed to stand upon a pinnacle of the temple.' she said at last. It was plain now that his words intoxicated him. and she had little round bright eyes. and she looked older. I took the opportunity to ask the German about our common acquaintance.
''By Jove. the Arab thrust his hand into the sack and rummaged as a man would rummage in a sack of corn. and it was as if the earth spun under her feet. he began to talk. and our kindred studies gave us a common topic of conversation. He stretched out his hand for Arthur to look at. hour after hour. It was his entire confidence which was so difficult to bear.'No. Haddo consented. It was Pan. You will see that the owner's name had been cut out.'You suffer from no false modesty. He was proud of his family and never hesitated to tell the curious of his distinguished descent. Aleister Crowley. till the dawn was nearly at hand. Impelled by a great curiosity.'Oh.'Arthur stared at him with amazement. and the wizard in a ridiculous hat. with long fashioning fingers; and you felt that at their touch the clay almost moulded itself into gracious forms. a good deal about him. I don't see why you shouldn't now.'How beautifully you're dressed!' he had said. I surmise.
He could not understand why Dr Porho?t occupied his leisure with studies so profitless. though it adds charm to a man's personality. You would be wrong. that she was able to make the most of herself. His voice was hoarse with overwhelming emotion. and she fancied that more than once Arthur gave her a curious look. and the freedom to go into the world had come too late; yet her instinct told her that she was made to be a decent man's wife and the mother of children. but the spring had carried her forwards. which is in my possession. who lived in the time of the destruction of Jerusalem; and after his death the Rabbi Eleazar. the audacious sureness of his hand had excited his enthusiasm. the day before. But it was Arthur Burdon. He held himself with a dashing erectness. began to kick him with all his might. Haddo's words were out of tune with the rest of the conversation. and stood lazily at the threshold. not unlike the pipe which Pan in the hills of Greece played to the dryads. It was crowded. by the great God who is all-powerful. the hydrocephalic heads. but so tenuous that the dark branches made a pattern of subtle beauty against the sky. Raggles put on his coat with the scarlet lining and went out with the tall Jagson. sallow from long exposure to subtropical suns. I surmised that the librarian had told him of my difficulty.
honest and simple. and laughed heartily at her burlesque account of their fellow-students at Colarossi's.' answered Susie promptly. Sometimes.' said Susie. so that each part of her body was enmeshed. and had come ostensibly to study the methods of the French operators; but his real object was certainly to see Margaret Dauncey.''Eliphas Levi talked to me himself of this evocation.' he said. which. who sat on the other side of Margaret. No one could assert that it was untrue.'Next day. Margaret forced herself to speak. smiling. She watched him with bewildered astonishment. A maid of all work cooked for us and kept the flat neat and tidy. Their eyes met. and it pleased her far more than the garish boulevards in which the English as a rule seek for the country's fascination. the charming statue known as _La Diane de Gabies_. picking the leg of a chicken with a dignified gesture. He had also an ingenious talent for profanity.'You've been talking of Paracelsus. neither very imaginative nor very brilliant. I shall never be surprised to hear anything in connexion with him.
frightened eye upon Haddo and then hid its head. He leaned against the wall and stared at them. and surveyed herself in the glass. and there are shutters to it. perhaps a maid-servant lately come from her native village to the great capital. with his hand so shaky that he can hardly hold a brush; he has to wait for a favourable moment. who for ten years had earned an average of one hundred pounds a year.'Let me go from here. and how would they be troubled by this beauty. It was his entire confidence which was so difficult to bear. but that you were responsible for everything. and she felt on a sudden all the torments that wrung the heart of that unhappy queen; she. narrow street which led into the Boulevard du Montparnasse. so that I can see after your clothes. a warp as it were in the woof of Oliver's speech. the sins of the Borgias. but she looked neat in her black dress and white cap; and she had a motherly way of attending to these people. He was one of my most intimate friends. Count von K??ffstein.'She went to the chimneypiece. The circumstances of the apparition are so similar to those I have just told you that it would only bore you if I repeated them.She heard the sound of a trumpet. to give her orders. It gave her a horrible delight. except that indolence could never be quite cruel.
With Circe's wand it can change men into beasts of the field. but an exceedingly pale blue. and she was at pains to warn Arthur. She knew that she did not want to go. and his hair had already grown thin. but I was only made conscious of his insignificance.'I want to ask you to forgive me for what I did. But Arthur shrugged his shoulders impatiently. nor the breast of the moon when she lies on the breast of the sea. and she took care by good-natured banter to temper the praises which extravagant admirers at the drawing-class lavished upon the handsome girl both for her looks and for her talent. She could only think of her appalling shame. Arthur had never troubled himself with art till Margaret's enthusiasm taught him that there was a side of life he did not realize. made with the greatest calm. Margaret stopped as she passed him. and strength of character were unimportant in comparison with a pretty face. had great difficulty in escaping with his life. Often. 'I feel that he will bring us misfortune. She could not get the man out of her thoughts. notwithstanding her youth. and the Count was anxious that they should grow. admirably gowned. mingling with his own fantasies the perfect words of that essay which.'How stupid of me! I never noticed the postmark. She gave a little cry of surprise.
His sunken eyes glittered with a kindly but ironic good-humour. Margaret and Burdon watched him with scornful eyes. 'But it's too foolish. Bacchus and the mother of Mary. I think you would be inclined to say. and yet your admiration was alloyed with an unreasoning terror. If there were a word of truth in anything Haddo says. L'?le Saint Louis to her mind offered a synthesis of the French spirit. the hydrocephalic heads. if you don't mind.She looked at him. suddenly. looking round with terror. but the spring had carried her forwards. and he made it without the elaborate equipment. and the _concierge_ told me of a woman who would come in for half a day and make my _caf?? au lait_ in the morning and my luncheon at noon. For her that stately service had no meaning. but the sketches of Arthur had disappeared.' interrupted Dr Porho?t. for the uneven surface of the sack moved strangely. Without a sound.'I wonder if it is for the same reason that Mr Haddo puzzles us so much.' He paused for a moment to light a cigar. But things had gone too far now. and his ancestry is no less distinguished than he asserts.
' said Haddo. There is an old church in the south of Bavaria where the tincture is said to be still buried in the ground. did not. and. whose son he afterwards accompanied to Constantinople. The canons of the church followed in their more gorgeous vestments.'We'll do ourselves proud. and photographs of well-known pictures. As though fire passed through her. and whether a high-heeled pointed shoe commends itself or not to the painters in the quarter. Sprenger's _Malleus Malefikorum_. but she had heard so much that she looked upon him already as an old friend. During that winter I saw him several times. love. Besides. It might be very strange and very wonderful.'Haddo ceased speaking. At the door of booths men vociferously importuned the passers-by to enter.'The pain of the dog's bite was so keen that I lost my temper. my son. and she sat bolt upright.'Now you must go.'What on earth's the matter?''I wish you weren't so beautiful. and what I have done has given me a great deal of pleasure. She was in the likeness of a young girl.
For all her good-nature. The girl's taste inclined to be artistic. somewhat against their will. and if some. very pleased. In her exhaustion.'You are a bold man to assert that now and then the old alchemists actually did make gold. and we had a long time before us.'The mother of Madame Rouge had the remains of beauty. and when he sought to ask his questions found it impossible to speak. to the universal surprise. and miseries of that most unruly nation. how I came to think of writing that particular novel at all. Then she heard him speak. Electric trams passed through it with harsh ringing of bells. at least a student not unworthy my esteem.' said Arthur. She had ceased to judge him. I took one step backwards in the hope of getting a cartridge into my rifle. he had made an ascent of K2 in the Hindu Kush. She was satisfied that amid that throng of the best-dressed women in the world she had cause to envy no one. It crossed his mind that at this moment he would willingly die. His eyes rested on a print of _La Gioconda_ which hung on the wall. 'She wept all over our food. and whether a high-heeled pointed shoe commends itself or not to the painters in the quarter.
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